What many people commonly refer to as emotional states are actually two distinct things: the physical sensations we experience in our bodies and the labels or names we assign to those sensations. Recognizing the difference between these raw physical feelings and the mental labels we attach to them is crucial. For example, the same bodily sensations might be labeled as anxiety by one person and excitement by another.

States vs. Emotions

Have you ever noticed how some days start off great, and no matter what challenges arise, you handle them with ease? On other days, even minor obstacles feel overwhelming. These variations happen because our emotional states influence how we perceive and interpret events. Besides emotional states, there are other types too, such as being in a “learning state” or a state of curiosity. Our reactions to any situation depend heavily on how resourced or depleted our current state is.

For instance, after a long, tiring day filled with stress and hunger, you’re likely to respond differently than when you’re rested and optimistic.

The Impact on Behavior

Emotional states influence behavior indirectly—they don’t cause behavior outright. When feeling angry, a person might be more prone to act aggressively; when relaxed, they might take more time to consider their choices. Between feeling an emotion and acting on it, there is often an intervening layer—some form of thought or another emotional state that frames the first one. This is sometimes called a “meta state.” As people mature, they tend to react less impulsively to their emotions.

Emotional States vs. Feelings

In NLP, bodily sensations are processed through what’s called the Kinesthetic System. Not all feelings are emotions—for example, you can feel hot, cold, or energetic without those sensations being emotional. Emotions arise when we interpret those bodily sensations, a process NLP refers to as a “Meta Kinesthetic” experience—meaning we add a mental label or meaning to the physical feeling.

Even fundamental emotions like fear are often automatic, unconscious interpretations of perceived threats. This helps explain why people can feel fear in non-physical threat situations, such as public speaking.

Emotions arise from complex interactions of chemicals and hormones affecting the nervous system, which in turn creates physical changes and often external expressions. The word “emotion” itself derives from the idea of “movement” — for example, adrenaline can increase heart rate and blood pressure.

The Map Is Not the Territory

Much confusion around emotions comes from conflating the physical sensations with the mental labels we use to describe them. NLP reminds us that “the map is not the territory.” The label we assign—such as “happy”—is not the actual experience of happiness, but rather a shorthand for a set of sensations and memories.

Labels and Their Role

Emotional labels function like the pictures on a box, helping us recognize and categorize what we feel. Inside the “box” are the memories and experiences associated with that label. For example, your label for “excited” might include memories like a first trip to the circus or recent enjoyable activities.

Though these labels serve as mental shortcuts, they shape the meaning we give to emotions. If the label doesn’t match the experience—like opening a box expecting cereal and finding dog biscuits—our reaction changes accordingly.

Emoting as an Active Process

Adding to the complexity, emotional labels like “joy,” “anger,” or “love” are actually nouns that stand for ongoing processes. For example, “love” represents the ongoing act of loving, not just a static feeling. Emoting is a dynamic process where the body organizes sensations into patterns to communicate internally and externally.

Because we treat emotions as fixed things, many people believe emotions are uncontrollable forces. However, thinking about emotions as processes allows us to gain more conscious control over them.

This misunderstanding is common, particularly in Western cultures, where emotions are often seen as spontaneous events beyond conscious influence. In reality, emotions arise from our mental associations and strategies.

You can even intentionally evoke emotions through conscious effort—for example, actors frequently recall personal experiences to bring emotions to the surface. (This relates to the NLP concept of eliciting states.)

Emotions as Valuable Information

Some people try to avoid emotions altogether, believing logic is less painful and more practical. However, emotions—whether positive or negative—serve as important signals that require attention. For instance, fear alerts us to potential threats, often related more to our self-image or social status than to physical danger.

How we interpret and respond to these emotional signals shapes our behavior and experience.