Meta model deletions refer to how we focus on certain aspects of our experiences while filtering out others. While we don’t necessarily remove information entirely, we selectively pay attention to specific details. In Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), this process is called deletion.
For example, when you ask a teenager, “How was your day?” and they simply respond with “Good,” they have omitted a great deal of detail. Similarly, the question itself leaves out many specifics. Open-ended questions naturally invite such deletions. If we didn’t filter out vast amounts of sensory input—sights, sounds, smells, and emotions—we would be overwhelmed. This filtering allows us to concentrate on what matters, such as recognizing our name in a noisy environment.
The Effect of Deletion on Choices
Deletion also affects how we perceive our choices. When people believe they have limited options, they often fail to see alternative solutions. Many say, “I’ve tried everything, and nothing works,” but upon closer examination, they may have only attempted a couple of strategies without full commitment. Our habits and familiar ways of thinking can obscure other possibilities.
Miscommunication and Missing Information
When people omit details in communication, misunderstandings can easily arise. If a child says, “I’m hurt” without elaborating, it’s unclear whether they need medical attention or just a comforting hug. Similarly, if a manager asks someone to “fix this report,” they may only mean correcting typos, but the other person might rewrite the entire document. Lack of clarity in communication often leads to unintended outcomes.
Deletion and Emotional Experiences
We tend to remember experiences that hold significance to us. Out of the countless events during childhood, most individuals can recall only a handful vividly. If someone offered a million dollars to prove they had a happy, exciting, miserable, or boring childhood, most people could find compelling stories to support any of these narratives. Unfortunately, this remarkable ability to selectively recall experiences can also lead people to reinforce negative emotions.
Types of Meta Model Deletions
- Unspecified Nouns (Who or What?) – When people use vague nouns, it’s unclear who or what they are referring to. NLP calls this a lack of referential index.
- Unspecified Verbs (How?) – Some verbs do not fully describe the action taking place, leaving room for interpretation. People often fill in the gaps with their own assumptions, a phenomenon known as mind reading.
- Simple Deletions – These occur when a part of the meaning is missing. For example, in a sentence like “Please give me the report,” it’s unclear which report is being referenced.
- Comparative Deletions – This happens when a comparison is made without specifying what is being compared. For instance, saying “This is better” doesn’t clarify better than what.
- Ly Adverbs (Hidden Judgments) – Words ending in “-ly,” such as “unfortunately” or “obviously,” subtly insert a judgment into the sentence, leading people to accept the statement without questioning its validity.
By recognizing and addressing these deletions in communication, we can improve clarity, expand our options, and reduce misunderstandings in daily interactions.
